How good are you at embracing mistakes?

Why do we try so hard to avoid mistakes?

 

It seems a bit odd, really, given that nearly everything we learned as a child came from making mistakes – learning to walk, talk, count, for instance. 

 

“The value of failing and making mistakes,” Professor Ben Voyer says, “comes precisely from the fact that it is one of the most natural ways to progress. Most of what we end up learning comes down to trial and error. Virtually all the skills we use on an everyday basis have been learned the hard way, through mistakes.”

 

Avery Harris-Gray sees the value: “Mistakes provide us with lessons that textbooks and lectures can’t replicate,” adding, “Experiential learning can be more effective and long-lasting than theoretical knowledge.” 

 

Two more endorsements – Mark Sisson, founder of Mark’s Daily Apple: “Mistakes keep us nimble and creative, open to a larger picture, focused on expansion rather than perfection;” and Kain Ramsay (founder of Achology.com) weighs in: “Every mistake is a learning opportunity. When you fully embrace your mistakes, you tap into an incredible power – the power of becoming a person you’re proud of.”

 

So Why Don’t We Embrace Them?  

Perhaps we were never taught to value them, to recognize that they’re “stepping stones on the path to success,” according to Harris-Gray. Improv actor Robert Reid says that in his profession, actors often refer to mistakes as gifts. 

 

So, what will it take? The key may be what author Amy Edmondson calls “psychological safety,” that is, creating environments – be they at home, in the classroom or at work – where it’s safe to share mistakes. From Edmondson: “Psychological safety is about feeling okay, about admitting mistakes. We’re all fallible human beings, we’ll all make mistakes, but it’s more about speaking up about them.”

 

Failure Friday

Matt Abrahams, host of the Think Fast, Talk Smart podcast, worked for a firm that instituted “Failure Friday” where employees nominated themselves to share a failure. Explained Abrahams: “. . . if we weren’t pushing the envelope, we weren’t growing.” 

 

Spotify CEO Daniel Ek is said to insist on constant experimentation, telling Dede Henley, who writes for Forbes: “We aim to make mistakes faster than anyone else.”

 

And how about our athletes? Jim Thompson, founder of the Positive Coaching Alliance, encourages his athletes to create a mistake ritual, “. . . something you can do or say, that communicates to yourself and your teammates and coaches that you recognize the mistakes, and you’re moving on.” Phrases he suggests: “Flush it,” “No sweat,” “Let it go,” and “Brush it off.” Mistake rituals, says Thompson, help build mental toughness and encourage recovery.

 

The Greatest Mistake? 

Avery-Harris’ favorite quote comes from Elbert Hubbard: “The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.” 

 

And psychotherapist Diane Barth shares her favorite, from Peter McWilliams: “Mistakes, obviously, show us what needs improving. Without mistakes, how would we know what we had to work on?” 

 

Make no mistake. Today again you’ll make a few. But if you realize how instructive they can be, you just might be willing to make a few more.